Where's Waldo?....I mean, Arthur.

My beautiful, non-violent son......

We went to the county fair on Tuesday and I decided to splurge on a face painting for him. It's not usually something I would do but we had just arrived and I knew we'd be at the fair for a while. Arthur ran to the choice board and started shouting off all of the selections "Mum! Look! Spider man!" "Mum! Look! A baseball! A Tiger! A Dog!"

He patiently waited his turn and climbed up on the chair. One of the many bubbly college girls asked him what he would like.

He exclaimed proudly, "A butterfly!"

I love my boy. He makes me so happy sometimes with his innocence that I could cry. He's his own person and I totally love that.

C is for...well, you know

Robin and an Oreo...........................o.k. you caught us it's an Organic Newmans-O. Same difference, less corn syrup. ;)

37 Weeks. Full Term.

The baby can come any time from this point on. The birth center does births from 37 weeks because it is now considered "full term". The baby can be born and will not be premature at this point. She is fully developed and can do everything she needs to do outside of the womb. It's a very comforting thought should Joanne go into labor soon.

Robin was born in 5 days from this point. It's weird to think that! Joanne went a week early with Arthur, and second babies tend to go a little sooner. But who knows? It's one of those things where you can't really lay out the cards and say "this will be the day"

36 Weeks

Arthur racing Kaity with a Mary Poppins chaser...

One step at a time..

I don't have any photos. But Robin took a few unassisted steps today. It's amazing what the bribery of a miniature cracker will do.

When you hit the "snooze" button.....

Robin's 1 Year Check-up

Height: 28 1.4 inches (1/4 taller than Arthur was at 1 year)
Weight: 14 lbs 14 oz (5 lbs less than Arthur was at 1 year)
Head: 17 1/2 inches (1 inch smaller than Arthur at 1 year, Arthur still has a big head)

Development: He's been moving for 5 months now so it's no surprise that he really knows how to get around. He's crusing and walking while holding onto things. No independent steps yet but he has let go a couple of times. He's much more interactive with his toys now, he definitely "plays with a mission in mind".

Language: We think he may have a word for cat..and maybe a word for Arthur. He does say "mumumumumumum" and we're not sure if that's intentional or not. He's more of a mover than a talker. Arthur was the opposite.

Growth: As much as his size is still tiny, he is growing. His bone structure is small and I think he's just destined to be little for a while. My grandfather wasn't a large man by any stretch and my mother and her family are all fairly petite as well. I think those are the genes passed down for him. He's on his own curve so they definitely aren't concerned at all. He's doing just fine.

Food: Robin is still nursing and will be for quite some time. With the full blessing of his doctor's as well. No liquid cow's milk yet...it wasn't even recommended for him today (athough yogurts etc. are fine). He's happy to nurse and I'm happy to nurse him. And his mommy's milk has far more fat and calories than cow's milk and he really needs that. We also think he may have some tummy issues with too much dairy and possibly eggs...so we're trying to watch those things very carefully.

He eats and eats and eats. But since he's such a mover, he's really just sustaining his growth. He's not really "bulking" up. But that's fine for him. He eats a huge bowl of old-fashioned "boil on the stovetop" oats every morning mixed with some fruit or applesauce. He really chows. Then after his nap he'll nurse (or have some yogurt if I'm working) and have a snack. Then usually another afternoon snack. And then dinner. The boy loves chicken. He's eaten an entire breast by himself. He really hasn't met a diced up, chopped up food he doesn't like. And like Arthur, he's going to be an olive lover as well. Then he nurses before bed. He's definitely pumped up on the calories, but we're still sticking to a healthy diet with lots of brain building fats from really good sources.

Vaccines: I had faxed over some information to our pediatric group about a month ago with some presentations of ethical alternatives to the standard MMR. I found out today that they carry both of the versions already so we can have them if we want. Our pediatrician wants to delay the start of those until Robin is 15 months anyway so we'll probably get one then, and then move to the second, and then the last. We're definitively skipping the chicken pox (varicella) vaccine and when I told the NP she was supportive saying "You know, we all had the chicken pox when we were kids...."

I'm thankful for the cautious presentation of the MMR, for breaking it up, and for being able to use versions of the vaccine that were not created with cell lines derived from aborted fetal tissue. I'm really happy that I was persistant and that we had one of the pediatricians who also was concerned about the issue. It's weirdly conservative of me. I'm such a liberal otherwise.

Speaking of: While we were waiting we observed a pamphlet on the desk in the exam room "Discussing sex with teenagers".....presented by "Focus on the Family". Yeah, the section on "What if my child is gay?" first emphasised that parents should "treat is as any other issue they dissaprove of" and be cautious because most of these encounters are "coerced". eye yie yie! We'll be skipping that brochure, thank you very much! ha ha ha

(Joanne thinks it's mandated by the current administration...she thinks they must be required to have it on hand...blah)

Anyway...

Back to Robin: He's great, he's growing, and he's a healthy boy!

The Truth is Out There

My third year in college I worked with a stellar group of individuals and later, most turned out to be very dear friends of mine. I don't really get to see them much at all, but they are dear to my heart. One of my biggest memories of working with them was the way that the X-Files permeated much of our discussions, gatherings, humor...

This was when the X-Files was all the rage, and was pre-rerun. Back when episodes were new and shiny. Several members of said group of friends were obsessed, never missing a show. And honestly, I didn't get it. I'd watch one from time to time and scratch my head, and wonder why everyone thought it was the best show ever.

Fast forward about 11 years....

Being strapped for ideas for Christmas, and being in the middle of our multi-year stretch when we didn't have broadcast or cable television I decided to buy Joanne a boxed set of a TV show that she liked. I tried to think of what would interest her. She loved Dallas, but I selfishly decided that it would be pure torture for me to have to sit through "Who shot J.R." again. Wasn't going to happen. Crank Yankers? I think that was probably a phase...

I knew she liked the X-Files, and while it kind of bored me in college I decided it to be the lesser of the evils and I went ahead and picked up season one.

It started to be a nice little thing for us to do around the time Arthur was born. We'd get him to settle down for bed, and we'd watch a show together. Some days we were just too tired for a whole movie and sans commercials, one x-files on DVD is about 40 minutes. It was just the right time.

Who knew that I'd finally see the light? And I got hooked. I finally understood the Barenaked Ladies' "Watching x-files with no lights on/we're dans la maison/I hope the smoking man's in this one" and why it was so clever. I started noticing when they recycled extras (Audrey Pauley), and started contemplating whether said killed off characters were really dead. (Both Spenders...nope! Lone Gunman, sadly yes.... Krycek, wasn't he killed of and resurrected several times?)

6 years too late clever...but clever none-the-less.

I thought season 3 was really well done. Season 5 was unmemorable. Season 7 was really creative and interesting. Season 8 was a tough adjustment and then Season 9 had me really really ticked off. What's up with the Terminator guy? They killed off the Lone Gunman?! Scully gave up her baby?! What the heck?!

And tonight it's done. Over. Finis. I'm honestly not sure how I feel about the ending. (Yes, I know...I'm 6 years too late and I don't really deserve to critique..ha ha ha). But it's weird that it's over now. I kind of want to know what happens.

Oh yeah....there's a movie coming out! I guess I didn't have such bad timing after all.

Happy 1st Birthday sweet baby boy!

Arthur's first pond swim

I had an employee appreciation event today sponsored by my work at a local recreation area with a pond. It was a warm day and it was a good one for swimming, cooking out, and playing in the park. Arthur's never swam in a pond before, mainly because I didn't know we had a good public one relatively nearby. He's been in pools, and never in water that wasn't over his head. So this was nice for him to actually be able to walk in and walk out and stand back up after "swimming".

(O.k. in the video it looks like he had a struggle after jumping in, but I swear it's just because I cut it off in a weird place. A nano-second later he stood back up)

Robin's first dip in the pool

Aside from the gob of sunscreen that got caked in his hair, he seemed to enjoy himself for his quick first dip.

Just so long as he's not "drunkly"...

We stopped for some soft serve on our way home from the park and on the way Arthur had mentioned several times how thirsty he was. So we arrive at the ice cream place:

Him: "Mummy, I need my water. I'm drinkly"

Me: "You're drinkly?"

Him: "Yeah. I'm drinkly. I need my water"

Not sure where he got "drinkly" from. I confirmed that he was also "thirsty". Either way, it didn't seem to impact his ice cream eating abilities.

The parenting rummage bin...

I have a good friend that I don't get to talk to a lot who sent me an email today about her son who may or may not fall into the "spectrum" of having sensory disorder issues. He still uses a pacifier at nearly three and she was getting concerned and frustrated by the things people have said to her in public. As I read, my heart started to break for her. She's dealing with so much, and to be confronted by strangers telling her "Get that pacifier out of his mouth!" and "You're being too lazy with him!"....I just really feel for her...even from the perspective of someone who in general really isn't a pacifier fan.

My first instinct was to feel really badly, because I'll admit that when I've seen preschoolers in public with a pacifier, I sometimes have a "that's odd" reaction. (Although I would never in a million years question another mother like that, it's not my place).

She went on to say that it's been so difficult and even with the "for now" pacifier blessing of her son's developmental counselor and pediatrician, she still feels like she has to keep explaining herself to friends, family, and strangers who just don't understand the world of Sensory Disorders.

I stepped back and thought about it. I can think of times as a parent, when I've felt the same way. When others may make a comment about your parenting choices and you feel that you need to defend yourself.. But still you feel like people are judging you and you question the motive of every "oh, you're still breastfeeding?" or "you use cloth WHAT?" And deep down you know that showing the extended rear-facing statistics with child survival rates, or spouting off the World Health Organization's recommended weaning age aren't going to help you. If people don't like it, they don't like it. But still, we as parents start to wonder if we're doing something wrong.

Why do we do this to each other?

I think in terms of how I've viewed other parenting choices that I've questioned, I've definitely grown. I'm by no means perfect, never claimed to be, but I've found myself over the past couple of years being less judgemental. Definitely firm in my parenting choices..and thank God Joanne and I as parental partners, and spouses agree 99% of the time with our parenting decisions. On many issues we didn't even need to discuss, we both just "know". There are many things we resolve to stay firm on, and we do...because they are important to us and the bottom line is, we're the parents. But in being firm about my own choices, also less judgemental of other ways of doing things.

Now, when I see that kid with a pacifier or anything I wouldn't necessarily do myself, I try to say to myself. "Who is it harming?" I don't mean perceived harm, I mean honest to goodness harm. Is the parent happy? Is the child happy? Are they safe? Normally it's adults inflicting predjudice on situations that actually cause the harm...and if it weren't for all this judgement there would be no problem. (That and I've since learned that pacifiers and thumbs don't harm teeth until they start reaching the ages of 5-7 or so.. ;) but that's besides the point )

There are a million different ways to raise children and none of us will ever be able to claim ourselves experts. Why even for a second give that "look" or make that silly comment? Why turn advice into judgement or a curiousity question into an opinion? Shouldn't we all be helping each other raise healthy, wonderful kids? And helping shouldn't mean "Do it my way, because this is the best way". Helping means saying "Hey that's something new. Tell me more about why you do it that way and I'll do my best to support your decisions". We should save the unsolicited advice for the really seriously questionable stuff ("you let your 4 year old drive? On the freeway?")

So to my friend, I'm sorry I used to be the mom who inwardly looked down on preschool pacifiers, and questioned pacifiers in general. I never meant to be that judgemental mom. I now know that you can't ever know a situation unless you ask and you can't ever make assumptions. Next time, If I'm curious about something I'll just ask, with an open heart, and not assuming that my answer is always the right one. There might be a really really good reason why a parent makes a choice that they've made.

And ultimately, if it harms none......what does it matter?

To steal from my other good friend, Jamie, who always leaves at the bottom of her signature on anything: "As it harms none, do what ye will"

We finally have a tooth!

Some time last week, after a couple of very cranky nights (which for Robin could mean anything), he woke in the morning with a tiny, speck of a dot on his lower gum. Joanne said it was a tooth. I thought it was a weird, tiny mouth zit. A few days proved that Joanne was right and now Robin has one gangly fang in the bottom of his mouth. If I can get the bugger to hold still for two seconds, I'll snap a photo. But so far, he's just not having any of that.

Ode to Janet...

.....who seems to read our blog religiously, and also shares with the girls at work.


"Hi" to the girls at Janet's work!


Thanks for helping to make the non-sensical blabber, and relentless picture posting worth it.


Also, if you can ever find that picture of Kaity as a baby that looks so much like Arthur, we'll post it and do another picture comparison. I love that stuff.

I'll leave you with some "Interplanet Janet":

An outfit comparison

I put Robin in a short overall set today because it was so warm outside. It's our first real "put the kids in shorts" day when I didn't question if it would get too cold later. I was watching Robin play and thinking about when Arthur wore the same outfit.



Here's Arthur in the outfit when he was just barely 4 months old.





And here is Robin today in the same outfit. Robin will be 11 months old in a few days.





What a difference!

Photos of the boys...

Happy 3rd Birthday Arthur!